Web Fed Award-winning Planets

Reviewed on October 15, 2000

Much to my delight this week's review centered on the totally rebuilt Visions, designed by Fed's own planet designer guru, Raphael. Finally, a planet done by a true expert! I started ticking off in my mind the features that I knew he'd not fail to put into his premier planet:

Liv'r Snaps in every location.
Dog doors from the LP to the restaurant.
Cedar filled pillows in the bars.
Poodles. Lots of poodles. Female poodles.
Fire hydrants accessible by a 'hike' movement from anywhere.
Get events causing huge cat-traps to engage and all paw-licking cats to fall in.
More poodles.

After all, how could it be a really well designed planet without all of the above? Sometimes I love this job, and this was one of those times!

I trotted to my ship with visions of poodles hand-feeding me Liv'r Snaps as I reclined in cedar-scented splendor dancing in my head.

>jump Visions

Visions Duchy Link
Emerging from hyperspace ships find themselves in a strange space. For some reason the link appears to have shifted farther from the edge of the gas torus. The ring doesn't glow in its vivid blue white but rather with ominous deep purple areas shot through with spots of red.
Frighteningly close to the ship, sensors detect the deceitful presence of a black hole to the east, slowly sucking down everything near, and threatening the visions gas torus as well.
From a point somewhere within the ring a strange arcane purplish red beam of energy shoots out towards the black hole, from the darkest part of the ring.

An automated message from the link warns that an ecological and magic disaster of epic proportions has occurred and the danger of the black hole. Visitors are cautioned to only follow the buoys southeast towards orbit. A reward of 1gig is offered to the persons who find out how to stop the calamity of

DARK VISIONS

>tb Hazed <whines> Hazed, there's Dark here too! I've had enough of the Dark, I don't like the Dark, can I go home now please please can I?

Your comm unit whaps you on the nose with a tight beam message from Hazed, "No.".

Never a demi-goddess to mince words, I knew Hazed had her mind made up. Further whining would only prolong my agony and probably result in the application of a muzzle to my snout.

I closed my eyes, gripped the Milkbone shaped joystick of my nav controls, gave the engines some thrust, and…

I died.

If you are in the habit of flying through links without reading the long descriptions, there's something you need to practice before visiting Visions. INSURE ME. Try it; make sure you know how it's spelled. Have I ever mentioned that one of the perks of being a senator is automatic re-flea when you suffer an untimely death? The rest of you keep practicing INSURE ME.

There's a colossal black hole in Visions space that can turn an insignificant Imperial-class starship into microrubble. You can imagine what it did to my flying doghouse.

There were other terrible awful things on Visions, too. Instead of Liv'r snaps, I found graveyards full of bones already so gnawed there wasn't enough left to make toothpicks. Instead of dog doors I found howling winds and rain to soak my fur as I scurried from location to location. Instead of cat-traps there were nasty little event tricks that kept my tail tucked and a whine locked in my throat. I did find one fire hydrant, but it was already occupied and in use by another cur. That was okay - I'd already emptied my bladder when I encountered the Horror.

The Horror stripped all the fur off my tail, sucked out most of my blood, and left me for dead. I wonder if that's Raphael's version of a poodle?

I ran for my ship in terror, looking now like one of the planet's emaciated drowned rats. But… my ship wasn't there anymore. Victim of the black hole? Confiscated for use as the ghostly ferry? Or was I just lost?

I don't want to reveal any more, you need to see this place yourself. The new Dark Visions has emerged as a showcase planet for Fed. Events, objects, and mobiles are cunningly worked into the planet theme. Descriptions are extended, but well worth reading every line. This planet makes the explorer forget everything except the horror around him – making it a must-see for anyone designing a planet or wanting a little pre-Halloween chill!

If you find yours truly in the catacombs on Visions, please take me home. The Horror is still chasing this poor hound, and my only defense is the Walrus awards I've been slinging at it as I flee!

Congratulations, Raphael, for a job chillingly well done!