 THE BUZZ I
MysteryNewsDroid@Hotmail.com
The infernal bunny debate continues
this week but took a somewhat nasty turn. 3 out of 3
women firmly agree that Mashimaro is INDEED a bunny. Why
does he continue to uphold the rabbit farce? Well, that
question was finally answered this week when Felina
informed his Duchess that he was refusing to take his
medication and was becoming more and more delusional. As,
always... there is more to the story:
Your comm unit relays a message
from Mashimaro, "your saying i'm not adorable
but you in love with me correct Felina?"
Your comm unit relays a message from Felina,
"how can you ask that after you broke my
heart;)"
Your comm unit relays a message from Mashimaro,
"you broke mine first."
Your comm unit relays a message from Zyphr,
"Felina! Bunny broke your heart?"
Your comm unit relays a message from Insatiable,
":;thwaps Mashi:: Bad Bunny!"
Your comm unit relays a message from Felina,
"::sniff:: yes.. I'm not sure I'll ever
recover..."
Your comm unit relays a message from Mashimaro,
"bah lies all lies."
Your comm unit relays a message from Zyphr,
"::conforts Felina and glares at the
BUNNY::"
Your comm unit relays a message from Mashimaro,
"she said i needed medication and then acts like
i broke her heart."
Your comm unit relays a message from Felina,
"Zyphr... is there anyway.. being that you're
his duchess and all that you could ensure the bunny
takes his medication regularly? He's having those
delusions again."
Your comm unit relays a message from Mashimaro,
"see there she goes with the medication
again."
St. Geiiga stunned the multiverse
this week when he took a vow of silence. Apparently the
Saint took a considerable amount of time to think up
interesting and thought provoking topics to incite
stimulating conversation on Channel 9 and was met with a
wall of silence. After a Newbie sent an out a distress
call, St. Gei informed him that there was no one there to
hear the SOS. This statement was immediately contradicted
by numerous commed responses which caused the Saint to
turn quite green. Fortunately for all, it was immediately
explained that the units had all been tuned to Channel 10
for all to cheer on their favorite fighters. The
pondering took a mere 62 seconds, but St. Geiiga reversed
his decision to be silent, much to the relief of all.
Ever wonder if those pesky cleaning
droids ever do their jobs? Determining to do an expose on
the worthlessness of the droids I came across the
following:
Greyspacewolf rolls his eyes
and has to go chase them down again
Zyphr stepped on something squishy...
Greyspacewolf pops his eyes back in and apologizes to
Zyphr...I just couldn't hold it any more
Zyphr scrapes off the bottom of her foot on the
barstool...
The public address system chimes softly and a voice
says, "Cleaning Droid to main lounge. Code
7."
Zyphr giggles, "How appropriately timed!"
Jazir laughs
Sistertwo laughs
Galinfenner seems to be on quite a
roll. With all his schemes going well for him, he's
become quite full of himself. Earlier this week, during a
fighting event that he was hosting, he insisted that the
spectators cheer for HIM instead of those actually
participating in the fights. Of course, all promptly
responded to his command hoping that they would be viewed
with favor when he finally becomes Emperor and feeling
that perfect practice indeed makes perfect.
A new face entered DataSpace this
week. Condor entered the multiverse looking for a wealthy
Baroness or Duchess to show him the ropes and to become
his companion. He promised the lucky lady that if she
"brought him up fast" she could remain at his
side as they took over the multiverse. This, of course,
caused load snickers and guffaws from those listening on
Channel 9, and, might I add, not one taker! As he
postured and begged, he soon figured out that there would
be no one who wanted to take him up on his offer so he
turned his attention to Gypsy, whom he insulted straight
away by yelling, "bring me Gypsy... the winch with
fire in her eyes." She calmly refused his advances
and retorted, "I mean God.. you spelled Wench
wrong.." Soon Condor grew weary of his advances
being shunned and either went to haul his way out of Sol,
or to find a dictionary so he could woo with proper
spelling!
Our favorite Ice Drakonian, Zlath,
awoke to a huge surprise this week when he went to sleep
on his planet but awoke in Sol. Raising quite an alarm
about Ming's minions (or are they under Galin's control
now?) moving him in his sleep, he set about to discover
why in fact this had happened. After much speculation and
making sure he was about his senses, it was discovered
that his capitol planet, Dusk, had closed during the
night causing the move. All charges against the minions
were immediately dropped.
Apparently Galin isn't the only
Host or Hostess that is creating a stir in the
multiverse. Felina is on quite a rampage. Czarina Zyphr
was recently flattering a Planet Owner of the duchy Poem
trying to rile up the Sleepless One with her prowess of
planet stealing. This caused Felina to lament the fact
that she also wanted to steal a planet! After much
discussion, several planets came up ripe for the taking,
Poem, as Felina loves poetry, Churlant, and Greyhaven. At
press time, Felina was still debating her options, but
was close to making her final decision.
Until next week, make DataSpace
your playground. I'm always watching!
THE BUZZ II
MysteryNewsDroid@Hotmail.com
Insatiable and her band of merry
woman have been doing their best to make the multiverse
more pleasant to the eyes. Recently they combated boredom
by doing makeovers for Galinfenner, Paladin and others.
So when you see them walking around minus their hairy
legs and unibrows, be sure and send your thanks to the
girls!
A new rank has found its way into
the Multiverse, the rank of Knight. Fishsticks was
knighted earlier this week in a very public ceremony.
Your comm unit relays a message
from Greyspacewolf, "::taps his tail on each
shoulder::"
Your comm unit relays a message from Greyspacewolf,
"you may rise Sir Fishy."
Your comm unit relays a message from Fishsticks,
"Woot, or something ;)"
Your comm unit relays a message from Sistertwo,
"it's official!! Woohooo."
Rumors have circulated that, since
Greyspacewolf knighted the Fishy one, he is now indeed
Emperor. But please don't tell Galin!!
This just in: "I admit to
being a bunny," says Mashimaro. No more Bunny
debates!!
I would like to personally
congratulate the great Duke Jazir and the Duchy Estate.
They celebrated their third year as a duchy on May 8. May
there be many more!!
The Buzz wouldn't be complete
without a Galin update. Earlier this week, Insatiable
posted the following:
212682:012 - Insatiable:
Someone's been raiding my panty drawer again. ::looks
for Fishy, Kam, Embri and Rasal:: I'm telling Jaz!
Unfortunately for Sati, and the
rest of us, the culprit was not from the duchy of Estate!
Galin was seen at the bar crawl this week flashing all,
not in his usual boxers, but instead, a red lacy thong!!
I hope he didn't break out into "I Feel
Pretty", but I wouldn't put it past him. Looks like
this newfound power has gone to his head!!
Transmission from Radio Free Mars:
Pirates are on the loose again in the dark alleys around
the ruins. Tread carefully and make sure your lamps are
fully powered as... <transmission interrupted>
Until next week, make DataSpace
your playground. I'm always watching!
ALSATIAN'S STATISTICS
Over three years have passed since
Hazed gave me the crash course in planet reviewing. Being
the demi-goddess she is and able to sum everything up
into short and easy-to-understand text, she laid this
pearl of wisdom on me: "Grasshopper," she
intoned sagely. "The review is entirely
subjective."
But objectively speaking, these
last three-and-something years can be statistically
condensed.
Articles written: 106
Articles submitted on time: 3
Nose-whappings from Hazed: 19
Planets reviewed: 59
Planets that disappeared after the review: 22
Planets that disappeared before the review: 5
Post-mortem requests for planets already gone: 2
Carpenter awards: 10
Walrus awards: 7
Gold plated dog pile awards: 1
Planets that have disappeared, taking their awards with
them: 10
Good dog fan mail letters: 2
I have the information on bribes
accepted, legs loved, holes dug, and carpets ruined but
you'll have to tb me for that information; I don't want
Hazed knowing too much.
THE BUZZ III
MysteryNewsDroid@Hotmail.com
There have been a couple of notable
sex changes in the multiverse. Bunbun will become Ms.
Bunbun soon but will still be equipped with her handy
switchblade. In addition, it's been rumored that Duke
Wyldcat has become Duchess Wyldcat! However, when Wyld is
addressed as such he/she threatens to prove a point one
way or the other causing everyone to flee and hide until
all is safe again. So the question still remains…
What is Wyldcat, Duke or Duchess?
Is the bunny off the market?
According to his supposed intended he is! He isn't
allowed to speak to with anyone of the opposite sex any
longer, and if he's caught flirting, he will be missing
his lucky foot! This news brought on despair from many
causing one to lament, "I've been threatened by
someone who claims the bunny is hers! When I first met
her, I thought she was all snuggly and sweet, but now she
stamps her foot and is possessive, calling him "Her
bunny" anytime another woman is near and flashing a
dime store ring. For the record, I saw the Bunny
FIRST!" Sources of the mischievous squire say there
will be upcoming nuptials, but if one Indy has anything
to do with it, she will destroy the ball and chain before
it's locked for good! Mashimaro, contacted at his private
office on Darkstar, refused to comment at this time, but
promised a statement at a later date.
Transmission from Radio Free Mars:
Next up, Ms. Kettering again… Thanks for the UFO
spotting, hun... but please, try to remember the exact
location next time, okay?
The Lunar eclipse caused much
discussion this week which was centered on the red color
the moon was going to turn.
212688:531 - Tiki: Oboy, lunar
eclipse/red moon tonight :)
212688:711 - Thulium: Ok... 500meg to the first one
to (correctly) post why the moon appears red(ish)
during an eclipse. (Re: Tiki's post)
212688:733 - Insomnius: The moon appears reddish
because the light from the sun is bent around the
moon. Welcome Xiao of Zhou and Xorna of Graupel! Poem
continues to build.
212688:741 - Tiki: I thought it was red cause the
earth's atmosphere filters out blue colored light,
the remaining light appears red or orange - the bent
light illuminates the light. Either way, looking
forward to it, yay!
212688:801 - Theimp: No eclipse. Imps take over moon,
moon go red, me go there tonight.
212688:949 - Frenchie: Okay I'll bite. I bend and
sift stuff all the time. No biggie. How come
filtering or bending moon light makes it red? Then
again, why can't you wear white heels with suede?
212689:029 - Armani: It's the angry sun being blocked
by the cold moon that makes it look all red! I'll be
back soon my little tart. {{Frenchie}}
212689:036 - Paladin: the red light is not bent.. the
other wavelengths are scattered, red is not scattered
212689:037 - Esperanza: But why? Why isn't it
scattered? Why is red special? Somebody always has to
be different.
My sources tell me the moon was
red, not because the sun passed over it, but instead
because Ming was going to give a bloodbath to the
insurgent Galin and his followers for trying to overthrow
the emperor. I guess we'll have to wait and find out who
won emerges as true emperor of the Multiverse!
Duke Spaun left DataSpace this week
taking many of his followers with him. Knowing he was a
charismatic man and captured people's souls didn't
indicate a concern to authorities that he might be the
next Jim Jones! But in a final meeting on Soulless, he
showed Can't, Notme, TheCoroner, Cinci and Dealer how to
play with their rusty knives and watched them go one by
one. Before following his flock, he was TBed by one of
his close friends who gasped, "What are you
doing!" To which he responded, "We were bored
and got carried away. Now I must lead them further
on!" We will miss you Duke Spaun.
Until next week, make DataSpace
your playground. I'm always watching!
THE BUZZ IV
MysteryNewsDroid@Hotmail.com
The Multiverse moved to Level
Orange this week, prompting the following travel
advisory:
Your comm unit relays a message
from Geiiga, "If you go to Z'ha'dum, you will
die."
Your comm unit relays a message from Felina,
"well thank you for that info Geiiga:)"
Your comm unit relays a message from Insomnius,
"Shucks, now I gotta cancel my vacation.
::grumbles::"
More news about the Duke (Duchess)
Wyldcat! No matter what he might or might not be, he was
recently seen cursing broken heels while running around
the multiverse. He had on a fabulous frock:
>ex wyldcat
Her scarlet silk dress parts on one side to show a
lengthy bit of leg. Her sandy brown hair is loose and
she winks a baby blue eye at you
but still needs to work with the
Divine Diva Priscilla at Cilla's Charm School! He might
want to speak to Insatiable about another leg waxing as
well!
Has Fed's newest Baroness lost her
bite for good?? Xyli was seen lamenting about the loss of
teeth and bloody gauzes earlier this week on 9. I tried
to catch up with her for an interview, but she was barely
understandable managing only to say, "I nibbled just
a bit too hard, oopsie!" Trying to pursue the
conversation quickly frustrated her as talking was
causing her to choke on the gauze, so she decided to take
a nap. Pondering the turn of events and a reporter's
instinct prompted traveling to Svaboda where the resident
Bunny was found with a bandage on his ear. In true Bunny
fashion, he quickly clammed up when asked about being
bitten.
The Multiverse has a new Duke, and
boy can he dance! Just ask the hostess with the mostess,
Miss Felina! Apparently his gyrations left her short of
breath and needing ice. Check out the log that was sent
in…
Dragonheart does a backflip,
lands on the bar, spreads his wings and begins
dancing
Zyphr exclaims, "Whoop! Dragon has had lots of
ALE!"
Felina is not sure she's seen a dragon dance before
Wyldcat grins
Dragonheart shakes his tail at you
Jordy swoons
Wyldcat ducks the swinging tail
Zyphr faints dead away!
Felina exclaims, "wooo hooo!"
Wyldcat catches Zyphr before her head hits the floor
Felina takes out some groats and wonders where to
stick them
Dragonheart does a flip off the bar, grabs all the
Ladies and starts dancing seductively
"Oh my", says Jordy.
Felina fans herself
Zyphr oohhs... and dances...
"Do dragons wear undies?", asks Jordy.
Dragonheart bumps and grinds with the ladies
Jordy looks for a place to stash the groats also
Dragonheart smiles at Zyphr and thanks her for the
$100 tip
Wyldcat smiles
Jordy whispers to Z, "Where'd ya stick it?"
Zyphr isn't telling!! ;)
Dragonheart would start stripping but can't remember
to buy clothes
Jordy giggles
Felina looks for a place to stick it
Dragonheart smiles and flashes you!
Zyphr faints again!
Jordy covers her eyes, but spreads her fingers a
little and peeks through
Dragonheart curls his tail around all his lovelys and
continues to dance
Jordy exclaims, "Felina! That's not a very nice
place to stick that!"
Felina grins
Zyphr feels her mouth go dry then start to water...
Dragonheart get a wide grin on his face
Jordy motions for some more champagne
"I found a better way to make groats other than
hauling....", says Dragonheart.
Zyphr makes a mental note to keep buying dragon ale!
Felina waves her groats in the air
Jordy laughs
Zyphr counts out how many Felina has and pulls out
more!!
Felina whispers to Zyphr "do you suppose he does
lap dances?"
Dragonheart dances over to Felina and slowly does a
backbend in front of her
Zyphr whispers back to Felina... "Oh girl... we
can only hope!"
Jordy rofl
Zyphr leans over towards Felina...
Jordy falls off her chair, laughing
You say, "wow..."
Zyphr gulps...
Dragonheart sets Felina in a chair
Felina feels faint
Dragonheart slowly starts dancing around her
Zyphr watches Felina with envy...and whipers to
Jordy, "It's her whip...they all fall for the
whip!"
Dragonheart blows a kiss to Zyphr
Jordy giggles and nods at Zyphr
Zyphr catches it and puts it exactly where she wants
it ;)
Felina grins and sneaks a grope while no one is
watching
Jordy falls off her chair again
Dragonheart spins around and lands in Felina's lap,
slowly grinding up and down
"oh my!", exclaims Felina.
Felina needs some water
Zyphr helps Jordy up, but her eyes never leave the
Dragon!
Jordy hands Felina a glass of ice water
Dragonheart flips over to the bar and grabs a cup of
water
Jordy thanks Z and keeps away from the flailing tail
Wyldcat has bought you a big glass of cold water!
Dragonheart dances back over to Felnia
Felina drinks some and pours the rest on herself to
cool down
Dragonheart bends back slowly and pours the water
down his chest
You say, "oooo"
"Go Mavs!!!", exclaims Felina.
Jordy lol
"sorry...", says Felina.
Dragonheart grabs a piece of Ice and slowly rubs his
nipples with it the puts it in his mouth
"and keep going Dragon!", exclaims Felina.
Dragonheart kisses Felina, giving her the ice in the
exchange
Felina pours the rest of her water on Zyphr
Jordy takes pictures
Zyphr tries to breath... "Yes.. that's much
better... thanks Felina!!"
Felina says, "hmmmmmmm the ice didn't cool me
down.."
Felina feels even warmer than before
Dragonheart reaches for Felina's hand and stands her
up
Jordy says, "utoh hehe"
Dragonheart dances around Felina until she faints
then slowly lays her on the couch
Zyphr fans Felina...
"Next?", asks Dragonheart.
Until next week, make DataSpace
your playground. I'm always watching!
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