TOP TEN WAYS TO STOP BOURBON FROM SINGING
by Hazed
A terrible thing happened the other day. Bourbon started to sing:
Your comm unit crackles with a message from Bourbon, "picks up the mike..."Got a hunka hunka burning luv, a hunka hunka burning luv.." Elvis has left the room"
Your comm unit crackles with a message from Bourbon, "thank you, thank you very much""
Your comm unit crackles with a message from Smitty, "bourbon ain't nothin but a hound dog"
Your comm unit crackles with a message from Bourbon, "Viva Las Vegas, Viva Las Vegas...Viva, Viva. Las Vegassssssss"
After everyone else stopped screaming they started to discuss ways to prevent this tragedy from ever happening again. Here are the top ten suggestions (well ok, there are eleven of them but I couldn't decide which one to drop from the list).
| 1. |
Take away his comm unit. |
| 2. |
Pay him off. |
| 3. |
Get him banned from all systems but Sol. |
| 4. |
Use the ignore command on him. |
| 5. |
Lock him from the game. |
| 6. |
Give him more drinks, and hope he passes out. |
| 7. |
Take away his computer. |
| 8. |
Lure him into the sun. |
| 9. |
Ensure that no matter what he does, when he sings, his planet loses money fast. |
| 10. |
Have customs pull him over every time he makes a move, no matter where he is. |
| 11. |
Sell tickets. When nobody buys one, he'll be so disappointed that he'll never sing again! |
Your comm unit crackles with a message from Bourbon, "lol, feel the luv in the room"
Thanks to Djentsch and Smitty for their suggestions.
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