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WEB FED NEWS YEARBOOKS Earthdate August 1999 |
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WEB FED NEWS YEARBOOKS Earthdate August 1999 |
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OFFICIAL
NEWS |
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The Internet got very sluggish in early August when a concerted attack by hackers on a particular type of server (not the ones that Fed uses) caused slowness and lag all over the place. A whole bunch of new Navigators were appointed to help new players in Fed, and Deathiscome, Beccai, Njrudeboy Juel, Fang, Kshandria, Abraham and Paccino all joined the team. Hazed started imparting information about the origins of things in Fed, in her new series of Sol Exposes (see below). In real life here in England we saw a total eclipse. It rained but was impressive none-the-less.
WHATEVER HAPPENED TO SMALL TALK? Usually when two people meet they engage in small talk before actually getting around to the business of the occasion - "Hello", "How are you", that kind of thing. These little social rituals provide the lubrication that allows people to get along without killing each other. They are not actually meant to exchange real information. Anyone who has asked someone how they are and received an honest answer accompanied by a list of disgusting ailments knows that! Instead they are the equivalent of two modems establishing contact with each other (the technical term for that is a handshake, which just shows how similar the processes are for humans and machinery). So why is it that lately in Fed I've seen so many people completely fail to use any small talk as a preliminary to business? It's now very common for me to receive a TB from someone asking a question:
It comes just like that, out of the blue, with no introduction, no polite greeting, no "Hello Hazed", or "Sorry to bother you", or "Would you mind answering a question"... and it's not just newbods; POs can be just as abrupt when asking me questions. Maybe everyone is so busy they don't have time for the little niceties - they have another load to haul, another build to complete. Saying "Hello Hazed" takes several seconds that could be better spent making groats. Maybe they are so awed by my demi-deity-ness that they become socially inept, tongue-tied so that all they can do is blurt out their request in the worst possible way. Maybe they don't believe that I'm a real person at all, but instead some kind of automatic answering machine that doesn't need to be buttered up to before it will give the desired response. Whatever the reason... I guess it's OK for people be abrupt with me. It's part of my job to answer questions. But are players like this with each other too? And if so, have they lost all social skills in real life? It would be very sad if that was the case.
Shakespeare said, if music be the food of love, play on. Not sure what he was getting at here - last time I tried to eat a violin I certainly didn't love it! There's lots of musical references in the Solar System and over the next few weeks I'll fill you in on their background. First up, a look at a location on Earth that confuses many people: Hagar's Music Shop. Let's take a look.
First off, this has nothing to do with rock guitarist Sammy Hagar. This location is, in fact, a homage to one of those pioneers who played Fed in the early days, on the Compunet system in the UK. Hagar was the nickname used by a chap named Wally, after a cartoon Viking in a strip in one of the UK's daily newspapers. Why a music shop? Because this Hagar was a musician who wrote music for many of the best-selling computer games of the time (running on the Commodore 64, Spectrum and so on). And yes, he did have a strange tattoo! The reference outside the shop to the wall of sound is - as the description says - to do with Phil Spector, the 60's record producer. His production style was to add layer upon layer of instruments, creating an incredibly rich sound that became known as the wall of sound. Among other artists, he produced the Ronettes, the Crystals and the Righteous Brothers. He produced Tina Turner's River Deep, Mountain High which at the time was the most expensive single ever produced. As a result, DJs refused to play the song, considering it outrageous that such a huge amount should be spent on a single. While on the musical theme, we should mention that lovely musical instrument also found on Earth: the Kalindra.
Sad to say, Bella doesn't recall exactly what she had in mind when she wrote this description, except for some kind of futuristic synthesiser-based gadgetry. She was also unable to tell us what urthyarn is. Next week, I'll uncover some more musical secrets, such as the Urban Spaceman and the Marillion.
Last week I explained the origin of some of the musical references found in the Solar System. This week - more of the same, as I talk about a mobile that wanders the corridors of the Moon: The Pink Floyd. It's named after one of Our Illustrious Leader's favorite bands (and incidentally, mine too).
Pink Floyd are a rock legend, one of those groups who seem to have been around for ever and ever, and keep on gaining new fans amongst whoever the "youth of today" happens to be, as well as retaining the support of the old wrinklies that loved them way back when. They survived throughout many changes of lineup, many changes in the public's musical tastes - they even survived punk music, which saw off many of the old hippy-style bands of the sixties and seventies. It's hard to describe their music... they don't fit into any category easily. Soft rock with wailing guitars, haunting melodies, intriguing lyrics. Many of the artists and bands that are currently popular in the type of music loosely called "ambient" cite Pink Floyd as an influence if that's any help. They've released far, far too many albums for me to list them all, but probably the most significant are Dark Side of the Moon and The Wall. However, as an excellent introduction to Pink Floyd I recommend the album "Pulse". It's a double live CD recorded on their European tour in 1995. It includes songs from throughout their career so provides an excellent overview of what they are all about. Order the Pulse CD from Amazon. There's also a video of the tour which shows just how spectacular their live shows are. Order the Pulse video from Amazon. Bit of trivia: the original UK release of the Pulse CD came in a special box with a flashing red LED on the spine. It was supposed to "die" after only a few months, but some lasted a lot longer, and it became a bit of a contest amongst my friends to see whose would last the longest. Mine finally conked out after just under a year. Next week continues the musical theme by looking at another of the Sol mobiles named after a band.
This week, we wrap up the look at the musical allusions in the Solar System with two final musical mobiles.
This vampire butterfly is found on Mercury, and like the Pink Floyd, it was named after a favorite band of Bella's. Marillion's music falls into the category loosely defined as progressive rock. It's a mix of powerfull, punchy rock and soft ballads, all with a very distinctive guitar sound; the lyrics are about something other than love or despair. Marillion were formed in the early eighties, and after a few shuffles of personnel they started to release albums. Their first real success was with Misplaced Childhood, an elaborate conceptual album reflecting the formative experiences of the lead singer, Fish. The ballad Kayleigh was released as a single and became a hit in the UK and the US. This album was followed by Clutching at Straws. Those two are my favorite Marillion albums; I'd be hard pressed to choose which one is best. Sadly, at this point Fish left the band. Marillion continue and have released a number of very successful albums. But the singer's departure left the band without whatever it was that had made them something special - whether it was Fish's writing, or his distinctive voice, I don't like their subsequent albums nearly so much. Fish himself has released several solo albums which, to my ear, have everything that the old Marillion had. You can order my two favorite Marillion albums from Amazon: Finally, our musical tour of Sol wouldn't be complete without mentioning the Urban Spaceman, who parades the corridors of Mercury.
Well, to save you having to listen to the record, here's a snatch of the lyrics:
Not very enlightening; perhaps you do have to listen to the record! The Bonzo Dog band were a sixties British art college band, best described as inspired lunatics. Their comic songs, sketches, exploding robots and much more earned them a cult following. Urban Spaceman is probably their most famous song. They released loads of albums, and surprisingly some of them are still available through Amazon. For a good overview, there's a 3-CD set called Cornology which seems to cover the highlights of their career.
SOL EXPOSE: TRADING COMMODITIES After our musical journey through Sol, let's turn our attention to more serious matters - a discussion of the trading commodities that are produced, hauled, and sold all over the Galaxy. Actually, there's little to say about many of the commodities:
If that's all there was to it, then this would be a pretty short article! Fortunately there are some commodities worth giving a few more details on.
Monopoles are not made up, but they don't really exist. They are one of those things that scientists have theorised about without actually being able to build, or produce, or discover any. Magnets have two poles - a north pole and a south pole. A monopole, however, is a magnet with only one pole. Bella speculates that people who store monopoles would have to be careful to segregate the north from the south, otherwise they would combine into ordinary magnets and thus become far less valuable.
Gas-chips are actually GAs chips, which stands for Galium Arsenide. They are military-grade computer chips that operate at much higher temperature than silicon chips; and yes, they do exist. Bio-chips are chips made out of biological material. You could say they are grown, not manufactured. These don't exist yet although scientists are working on the idea.
You all know what a laser is - the word stands for Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation, and it's a device which amplifies an input of light to produce an extremely narrow and intense beam. A maser does the same thing, but with microwaves instead of light. Yes it exists, and it's used to amplify radar and radio astronomy signals.
Synths are short for synthesisers - not the musical instrument, but machines that reproduce three-dimensional objects. Kind of the next stage up from photocopiers. This kind of device is beloved of science fiction writers, partly because it gets around the problem of having to stock spaceships with enough supplies for their five-year missions to seek out hackneyed plot cliches, and also because when they go wrong the ensuing disasters make great stories.
These are alien artifacts. They don't require any raw materials to produce but they need a lot of labor, because they are obtained either by digging them up in alien ruins, or finding an existing alien race and stealing their treasures - or possibly trading them for worthless beads.
Many of the leisure commodities are entertainment products based on what's available today - just taken to a higher degree. Hypnotapes are the ultimate in virtual reality total immersion. These may incorporate sensory amplifiers which would enhance all the senses - much as a magnifying glass can enhance sight, but covering smell, taste, touch and hearing as well. Studios are portable devices that can act as a complete recording studio, for sound and images, recording holos - holograms, 3-dimensional images. Musiks are whatever the future will replace our current music CDs with, and libraries are the equivalent of todays CD-ROM encyclopedias.
We are going all highbrow and intellectual this week, as we answer the question: Who is the enigmatic mobile who waits in the snackbar on Earth?
What is he waiting for? And whatever it is, will it ever arrive? This is a literary reference to a character who is at the center of a very famous play, without ever actually appearing himself. The play is called Waiting for Godot and it's by Samuel Beckett. It's from the 1950's and at the time was a true innovation in drama, heralding a whole new style of play. The play consists of conversations between the two main characters, Vladimir and Estragon, who are waiting for the arrival of Godot - we are never told who Godot is and why they are waiting for him. Godot sends messages periodically promising he will appear, but he never does. The waiting men encounter two more characters, and the four of them discuss their lives, their positions, their miseries, trying to find some meaning and direction in their existence and hoping that Godot - when he gets there - will be able to provide enlightenment. But he never does arrive, and they go on waiting... In Fed, it's Godot that does the waiting, and we don't know if he is waiting for enlightenment of his own and if so, who he expects to provide it. Order Waiting for Godot from Amazon There used to be another literary reference on Earth, but it's not there any more. In the hospital morgue, lay a mobile called Bodies. The description said it was the bodies of Rosencrantz & Guildenstern. The reason the mobile isn't there any more is that grammatically it never worked. When you walked into the room you were told:
Of course, it should have been, "The bodies ARE here", but Fed doesn't have any provision for multiple, or plural, mobiles. So the mobile was taken out again. So why am I bothering to mention a mobile that no longer exists? Well there is a reason, trust me. Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are two minor characters in Shakespeare's Hamlet - very minor, in fact almost unnecessary, who die simply because they are in the wrong place at the wrong time. But playwright Tom Stoppard wrote a play called Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead. The events recounted in Hamlet take place in the background, or offstage, and R & G are the central characters, but still just as unaware of what is happening, and unable to affect the events which ultimately lead to their deaths. On the way, the play takes a very sideways look at Hamlet, casting its tragic events in a new light. Although the play was written a long time after Becket's work, it covers many of the same themes and has been compared to it. Hence it's relevance to this week's Sol Explose. Personally, while I find Waiting for Godot a fairly miserable and tedious play, Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead is much more enjoyable, a very witty play. It is one of those rare things: a play which is actually fun to read off the page, as well as to see being performed. And incidentally, Tom Stoppard wrote the screenplay for the recent hit movie Shakespeare in Love. So if you enjoyed the sparkling, witty dialog in that film, you'll like this play too. Order Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead from Amazon PS - a knowledge of Hamlet probably helps if you want to read this play - but if you can't face reading it, catch one of the recent film versions: Kenneth Brannagh and Kate Winslett
SOL EXPOSE: A MUSICAL POSTSCRIPT I thought I'd finished talking about music, but first I have to admit I made a mistake. Yes, the demi-Goddess is not completely infallible! Only half-infallible, and on this occasion my human side caused me to say that the Marillion is found on Mercury, when of course as you all know, it lives on Titan. Also, there's one more musical reference I overlooked, which can be found deep in the Martian ruins:
For the benefit of anyone too young to know, Jim Morrison was the lead singer of the Doors, a sixties West coast rock band. Tragically, Jim died of an overdose, although the rumors flew at the time (and for all I know still do) that he didn't really die at all. Hence the grafitti in the ruins! For an introduction to the music of the Doors, try one of the "greatest hits" or "best of" collections available. You can listen to samples of some of the tracks on this page. Isn't technology wonderful!
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